Jon Stewart, always playfully lamenting his duty to host Monday evenings on The Daily Show, humorously expressed his reluctance to return to work after a month-long break. This episode marked his first show since the completion of the Paramount-Skydance merger in early August.
“Coming back felt uncertain,” Stewart started, “taking the latter half of the summer off, and next thing, we’re under new management at the network. I wasn’t sure if they’d even let us back in. Luckily, we haven’t heard from them, but fortunately, someone left a window open, so here we are.”
Stewart spent a good part of his segment discussing the peculiar situation where President Donald Trump, aided by his team’s excessive flattery, seemed to be living out a Make-A-Wish fantasy. The episode’s title posed the question, “If Trump Isn’t Dying, Why Is He Being Treated Like a Make-A-Wish Kid?”
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Stewart addressed the media frenzy regarding rumors of Trump’s demise, precipitated by his absence from the public eye for several days. “You journalists can’t relax,” he remarked. “Can’t a man enjoy some downtime and a minor cosmetic procedure without everyone starting to measure him for a coffin? It’s a testament to Donald Trump’s pervasive presence that if we don’t see him for a mere 20 minutes, we assume, ‘He’s dead.’”
He went on to jest, “Of course, Trump hasn’t passed away while in office, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he tried to claim that as another achievement, something Biden has already done.”
Commenting on Trump’s reported diagnosis of venous insufficiency, which causes swelling and skin changes due to faulty vein valves, Stewart added, “It’s not just about the swollen ankles, either. It seems his entire body is experiencing some drainage issues.”
Showing an image of Trump’s discolored hand, Stewart couldn’t help but exclaim, “Good Lord, grandpa! Hide those, will you? And that makeup — it’s not like leprosy can be covered up with a trip to Sephora. Remember, these are only the bits we can see.”
Towards the end of the show, Stewart argued that Trump resembled less a terminally ill child and more the omnipotent six-year-old from a notorious episode of The Twilight Zone, who sends those he dislikes to a cornfield. He referenced a Supreme Court decision that favored Trump’s racially and linguistically discriminatory ICE raids in Los Angeles as a sign of institutional subservience.
Adopting the iconic anthology series’ monochromatic visual style and narrative tone, Stewart concluded, “Consider a country at the mercy of a petulant man-child president, who might or might not be succumbing to hand-syphilis. He’s definitely puffy — very puffy. And we’re stuck with him for three more years. Welcome to the Twilight Zone.”
Watch the full episode below:
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